Ready Isn't a Feeling

September 2, 2025

If my mother were writing this newsletter about readiness and decisions, she could point to younger me as Exhibit Number One on procrastination. (Love you, Madre!) This might surprise some of you who know me as the person who loves to get the party started, galvanize a team around possibility, and cheer clients to success. All true, but during the wobbly transition from summer slack to fall frenzy, I regress to my childhood bad habit of delaying decisions. As children, we don’t readily see the consequences of delay, but as adults pursuing career pivots, promotions, and success, “I just don’t feel ready yet” can be the most perilous words for our careers. And the kicker?

Ready isn’t a feeling you wait for; it’s a decision you make.

Readiness - A Myth

We somehow believe that readiness – and whatever it is we are seeking – arrives as a perfectly wrapped, ribbon-tied package delivered directly to our door, complete with confidence, clarity, and a foolproof plan. We go to bed one night, fretting with worry and yet imagining that we will wake up tomorrow, find that box on our doorstep, and be immediately (magically!) prepared to stride boldly toward our goals.

In reality, the feeling of readiness is the result of taking action; my clients who have the most success in either seeking or navigating change don’t wait for readiness to arrive—they choose it, then build it through action.

Decision & Action - Personally Experienced, Scientifically Proven

My experience in coaching is supported by research. In the 18th century, David Hume famously introduced the idea of decision-making as driven by emotion but a rational act.

In the 1800s, William James and Carl Lange proposed that emotions are a consequence, not a cause, of physical reactions to emotions in their Theory of Emotions. In the 20th century, Neuroscientist Dr. Antonio Damasio fundamentally challenged Hume's original hypothesis with his research on ​decision-making​. Damasio's studies on those with damage to the prefrontal cortex revealed that when we lose emotion, we also struggle with decision-making. His research showed how we make decisions based on how we feel, and then our rational mind creates the justification. Damasio's Somatic Marker Hypothesis goes on to say that when we have an emotional response as a result of a past decision, somatic information helps us make future decisions. More simply, there is a reason we "follow our gut." Finally, George Lowenstein's research on the empathy gap in the 1990s determined that we rarely project a different future emotional state when making a decision. This means that waiting to “feel ready” usually means waiting for our logical mind to eliminate all possible (impossible) or rejecting the idea that our feelings will change, and so might the decisions (likely!)

Action precedes motivation; we need to start moving before we feel motivated to continue.

Confidence is built through competence, which is developed through practice. We can only prepare so much, then we must engage.

The “planning fallacy” causes us to overestimate how much preparation we need and underestimate our current capabilities.

Five Steps to Move from Feeling to Decision

So what can we do to shift from feeling (not doing) to decision (taking action!):

1. Momentum - My clients must tire of me saying this, but when you have all cylinders on, not only will you have less time to hesitate and procrastinate, but momentum itself is a fuel to action. Send those emails, make those calls; the energy expended helps us shift into action.

2. Know enough, not everything - We are never 100% ready for any significant decision. In addition to not being able to guarantee an outcome, if we are truly learning —and honestly, we always should be—there must be some discomfort to indicate that we are in learning mode. To ward off procrastination, we can ask "Do I know slightly more than less?" or "What's enough?" Define the bare minimum and ... go!

3. Prepare, Don’t Procrastinate (and forget about Perfection) - In addition to both words starting with a P, we often confuse preparation and procrastination as being the same (throw perfection in there, and we will never take action). Preparation ends in action; procrastination does not. To discern the difference between preparing and delaying, ask yourself: Does this preparation get me closer to my goal? or Is this preparation helping me to avoid taking action (and seek perfection?”

4. Focus on the Next (Right) Step - Don’t let change stare you down. Identify a small first step you can take today and another small step you can take tomorrow. And the day after.

5. Reframe Uncertainty as Opportunity - Gaps in knowledge are not a reason to wait, they are an intellectual itch to scratch, a reason to learn. The fastest way to fill those gaps is find them in real-world situations.

The Cost of Waiting

The associated costs of waiting may be even more cause for action than the five action steps listed above. Consider:

1. Opportunities have a shelf life. Whether it’s a new opportunity, job, or project you want to lead, it won’t wait for you to be ready. Choose to meet the moment.

2. Others are taking action. And many of them are less qualified than you are. (Again, for those who feel like an imposter: MANY TAKING ACTION ARE LESS QUALIFIED THAN YOU ARE!)

3. Not growing is dying. Sounds dramatic, but stagnation is a significant cost. Waiting corrodes our confidence. The more you hesitate, the more space doubt has to expand and create a self-fulfilling prophecy.

   
   

The ReFrame - Make the Decision

So how do you shift from waiting for readiness to choosing it? How can we overcome the fear of failure so we can take action and not procrastinate? The key is to identify where fear of failure is consuming space.

What would you do if you had no fear? What would you do if failure were as accepted a part of learning as success?

Your resulting action leads to either success or understanding, as failure is not an option.

Your Next Step 

We all have postponed goals, avoided conversations, and arms-length opportunities that we have convinced ourselves we're not ready for. The question isn’t whether you feel ready. The question is whether you will choose readiness and build confidence through action rather than postpone confidence in preparation. What would you do today if you stopped waiting to feel ready and decided you were ready?

Success is a Practice. Success is practice.

It's a myth that anyone feels 100% prepared. I certainly didn't feel 100% ready when I started my coaching practice, wrote my book, or tackled just about anything else. But I trusted myself to learn from taking the next step. And that experience taught me more than any amount of preparation (or procrastination) could have. Your fabulous future self isn’t waiting for you to feel ready: it’s asking your present self to hurry up, choose readiness, and take action.

The decision is yours to make. And I am here to help.

What action have you been holding back on? What support do you need to take that action? Drop a comment below. Curious about coaching? Say Hello!